45 Things Not to Feel Guilty About Due To Having HS
I find that I tend to carry guilt and sometimes it has to do with my hidradenitis suppurativa. HS is so difficult to live with and sometimes it causes obstacles not just for me, but the people around me too. I may not be able to do certain things and may have to rely on others, or maybe I have to cancel certain things at the last minute.
HS is not my fault
I constantly have to remind myself that HS is uncontrollable and not my fault. It may cause inconveniences, but you should never feel guilty for how it causes you to feel or what you’re able to do (or what you’re not able to do for that matter).
Here’s a friendly reminder of 45 things you should never ever feel guilty about:
- Calling out sick to work.
- Canceling plans at the last minute.
- Not answering a text message or phone call.
- Saying no to partaking in physical activities.
- Wanting to stay home instead of going out.
- Saying no to situations that you know will trigger stress and anxiety.
- Distancing yourself from individuals that cause you stress and anxiety.
- Eating something that triggers you just so you can feel normal and like able bodied people.
- Wanting to be left alone.
- Just wanting to lay down.
- Taking naps.
- Avoiding being out in the summer heat.
- Not partaking in activities that can potentially make flares worse (like shaving, drinking, smoking, being in the heat).
- Prioritizing self-care.
- Prioritizing your needs.
- Leaving a social gathering early.
- RSVPing yes to something but instead having to later RSVP no.
- Wanting to stay home and read or watch a movie instead of a party.
- Disassociating with society until you’re feeling better.
- Going to bed early.
- Taking a soothing bath.
- Having brain fog.
- Having fatigue.
- Getting your groceries delivered instead of going to the store.
- Asking for help.
- Making a room smell of menthol because you’ve slathered Vicks on.
- Saying no and not giving any further reason.
- Asking for modifications and substitutions on your food.
- Rewatching the same show and movie/listening to the same song over and over again because it raises your serotonin levels.
- Ask a friend or family member to come with you to a doctor's appointment.
- Scrolling mindlessly on Instagram/TikTok to try and distract yourself from the pain.
- Faking a smile.
- Ordering take-out instead of cooking.
- Wearing comfy clothing when you’re at home or running errands.
- Having scars and marks.
- Wearing clothing that shows those scars and marks.
- Making a quick and easy dinner instead of something that is strenuous and time consuming.
- Spending money on products that could potentially make you feel better and help your comfort levels.
- Telling the truth when someone wants to know how you’re feeling.
- Having a mental health day.
- Talking to a psychiatrist or psychologist.
- Coloring in a coloring book to try and relax and distract from the pain.
- Purposely listening to sad songs and having yourself a good cry... because sometimes you just need to get it out.
- Not being okay.
Do what makes YOU feel best!
But in all seriousness, HS is not your fault and please never feel guilty for having your feelings. Every single one is important and justified. Do whatever makes your life the easiest and have you feeling the best. Never feel guilty for it!
Have you taken our In America survey yet?